Germany: turning point in male contemporary awareness

Friday February 13, 2009, the Italian newspaper “Il Foglio” reported, on page 2, an article signed by Andrea Affaticati by the title: “Story of Eight Germans Reclaiming Paternity on Their Never Born Children”. Of this article, we here report the essential parts, the ones that stroke us particularly.

The main part of the text highlights what was published on the coversheet of the weekly newspaper “Stern”, June 6th, 1971, i.e. the faces of 374 women that at the time pronounced publicly their abortion, creating thus the conditions so that in Germany, eight years later, abortion within the first three months of pregnancy was made effective.

The German periodic paper “Die Zeit”, nowadays – 38 years later, is by the side of men. Specifically, it gives voice to the companions of some of those women, the missed Fathers, that now reply to that public yell of “we have aborted!”, made by their female companions of the time, with a dramatic “we have too!”.

This yell, underlines the “Il Foglio” article, is as resolute and loaded as the other. “We have too” has the tone of a quivering protest, a request to be finally listened to.. the stereotype showing men as less involved, less touched, not emotionally scarred from the decision of not bringing the baby to light, must be abandoned”. “These eight men have lived in a traumatic manner the exclusion and this pushed them to confess publicly their wounding”.

Men exclusion regarding the possibility of decision in the sense of life or death destiny of their children – as reported by law – is the base of their torment. “One of them, Volker Gitt, 40 years old, trader, has denounced this: “I was extremely happy about the child whom she instead didn’t want. We went together to the consulting room. There I was told, kindly, that the father’s presence wasn’t foreseen. She decided all with the doctor. I became desperate and denounced her and the doctor. It was useless”. Same stories and conclusions come from the other men, among which Lars Ultrich Schlotthaus, 45, designer, who underlines: “.. I gave the stupidest reply I could have given to my wife: it’s a decision that, in the end, you should take. Nowadays I am strongly convinced that men should have the right, recognized by law, to give their opinion in this regard”.

From our point of view, the Andrea Affaticati article shows a turning age point in male consciousness: eight fathers, after decades, have their voice heard, claim and cry for their children aborted by their female companions, even though in some cases with their consent. Die Zeit finally raises what is too often madly denied by males: the extremely strong paternal bond and involvement between the father and the conceived child. Starting from now, the general perception of male consciousness in terms of abortion has changed and will change for everybody: the conceived child is not “something” for and of women, but a person in relation since the beginning with them, fathers and men, together with the mother and women. Law must consider this. Other men will decide to abandon the madness of accepting law irresponsibility and irrelevance in respect to the relation of men with their conceived children, their life and death. They will have the courage to express their mourning for children aborted by their companions, even if this is originated from their initial decision or anyhow passivity or unawareness in respect to the unequal and mad law in this regard.

[ February 16, 2009]

[16 November 2009]